it pains and hurts me to go thru situations like that and to add on to the pain inflicted, i realised i could confide in no particular soul. no matter who i tell, what i say, responds received will always be on the surface level. im so sick of depending on hopes anyone has assured me of helping to turn everything for the better. i do understand that it takes time. but how long do i have to wait? for how long am i able to wait?
im suffering from all sorts of breakdown. but bcos i promised myself not to give it to anyone nor to vent my anger on anybody, i ended up keeping everything to myself. yes… being happy is just on the outside for me. but to whom can i show my sadness to? i dont need someone to press me into telling him/her my problems. neither do i need anyone to entertain me and telling me just tell him or her when i feel like it. all i want and need is someone who can be by my side and giving me tight hugs and assuring me he will be there whenever i need any consolation. thats enough. ive been trying to seek what i wanted thru numerous and countless ways. well, there is a certain bit of satisfation but it is not long lasting, for sure. overall… this is driving me:

crazy.
on a lighter note, finally got to meet ART and ben. did alot of catching up and heard stories from both of em. really entertaining!
visuals!








